happy birthday!

it has arrived. and it's so much bigger than i ever expected. how did i not remember that 24" is 2 feet haha

i'm a crazy. i was so excited about it the entire week and then it got here... and i DIDN'T OPEN IT. and now i'm tired cuz i WAS really excited it was just pent up and now it's gone. and then i remembered i slept bad last night - but the two have no relation to each other.

9:30am last year i graduated. and at 9:30am exactly one year later I got a NEW BUDDY! lol. it's good to make good comparisons especially when you feel like you've done nothing significant. wake up crazy face you've done lots!

say hello to Immi!

every memory

1 year ago today I helped dedicate the yearbook. I canNOT believe it's already been a year. This Saturday is the 1 year anniversary of me graduating. I know right? FREAK OUT! It's a cool, scary, heart chilling feeling. Can't explain it. I'm so glad theres not an option to stay in college forever (sans DeJuan). Ya gotta move on... it's not even an option (again... sans DeJuan).

Who would have thought of all things YEARBOOK would be a huge defining moment in my life. haha it's like "you NERD!" but it was literally the BANE of my existence. Don't lie. Yearbook = bane. It literally drove me insane. It's like you're in labor WHILE you're pregnant for 9 months. You still get this fun product at the end but you also get horrible pains from conception on haha.

Anyway I hear this year's yearbook is fantastical and I'm super excited. I'm fairly sure we won't ever have craptastic yearbooks again.

Even though it's a year later I'm still at a shifty-shaky-non-place. I'm way better than I was in say, October, but I'm definitely still working on getting my life balanced. Does anyone remember those toys... the middle was a bouncy ball and the outsides you could stand and balance on? and you could like jump around on it or balance on it? it kinda looked like Saturn. That's what I feel like I've been on for the past 6 months. Balancing is always better when you have something to hold onto, to steady you - that would be Jesus... I know it'll take a little time and a lot of faith and patience... but AHH waiting suuuucks! haha

I'm at work watching middle aged women return everything they've ever purchased from Chico's catalogue to Chico's outlet. I feel like they do it on purpose so they can capture them inside their spider web of a store and EAT them... that is make them buy more product. Fairly sure that Chico's loses more money than they make daily. haha i just thought everyone would enjoy that tidbit of my working life.

instroducing!

Yep, I spelled that title wrong on purpose. I could explain it to you but it would take too long and at the end of the explanation you'd be like... "Abby's duuuumb" My sister says that often.

I just wanted to introduce you to the newest member of my family. Yes, my family. I'm going through remorse at the moment so I will take this adopted member BACK if need be. But most likely... we'll love each other haha

She is quite shy so it may not talk to you at first but trust me, she is friendly. Pretty sure it'll have a name. My DELL has a name (Julie) so I mean... there needs to be a name. Leanin' towards Emme right now or Immi (short for Imogen but more for iMac mhmm there's thought going into this) Thoughts?

ALSO. If anyone has extra licenses on CS2/3/4 that they have I would GREATLY appreciate it if I could use one and I could pay. puh-leaseplease.

in *two, three, four* and out *two, three, four*

I'm so done with cars right now. I'm building a time machine so I can go back to when buggies got stuck in mud ruts in the middle of the road and the worst maintenance cost for your horse was a new horseshoe and a good brushing.

Does it ever end? Maintenance? Problems? for real? i mean oil-changes mhmm it's like a check up but then your brakes go and your belts go and you need a coolant flush. it's like cars are old people! first your boobs go, then and you're chiseling extra notches into your belt cuz you're huge, then you need a colonoscopy after 50 cuz apparently you're just BACKED. UP.

I just... have never encountered as much car STUFF as i have this past month. Stickers, plate stickers, taxes, tune-ups, oil changes, brakes, engines, oil pans, SMOKE AND DISASTER. Down with cars ok down with cars. :0(

I guess my real problem is money. I know right cuz EVERYONE has money problems right now. EVERYONE. so i know i'm not alone I just don't like that my mom has to worry about it and I can't help like I should and all I wanna tell her is "trust God" but ya know sometimes you can't even hear that... but it's the truth. I just want to be completely worry free knowing God will take care of me. Work hard as hard as I can and seriously expect God to come through but when worry comes and fear comes (as in most cases follows) you just can't even hear or see through that haze of fear and worry. bah. it's super frustrating. So in my devotion time I am just... gonna pray and stand on the Word. and it won't be 'well dear Jesus please help' ya know? I'm gonna PRAY haha and then stand. standin's not so fun though.

here at the wall

I'm here at Olivet. Hello everybody :0)

I realized I haven't been back in a long time... like almost 6 months. And I was kind of really ok with that? I still am. But it feels good to be back and have a job so you don't get the awkward convo of:

"sooo whatcha been up toooo?"

"mmm just... still looking for a job cuz i suuuuck"

"haha... yeah it's rough"

"YEAH IT IS ROUGH OK YOU HAVE NO IDEA STAY IN COLLEGE FOREVER"

not EXACTLY like that but along those lines... 

had a coffee meeting today that went relatively well. i seriously AM over it (thank you thank you thank you Jesus!) and now i'm at this... non-place i can't even explain it. theres no emotion. i describe it with a flat swiping motion of my hand *swipes* nothin. i lurve it. it means there is hope of moving past without DWELLING on the past. then i went to Maggay's AWESOME house in Sk3 it's gooorgeoouuus. and i wanna live there. and now for dinner and gospel choir w00t... then... ya know driving home but it'll be ok. :0) 

propelling forward feels so good even if it's not where you want it to be right now... you're still moving. i love it.

And All We See

This is a good design article for anyone doing websites or just love typography in general (<3 <3)

http://www.aisleone.net/2009/design/8-ways-to-improve-your-typography/

check it out yo!

we made it! yaaaaay!

I did it! And there was no cardiac arrest, anaphylactic shock or cutting of lvad wires or NOTHIN'

and i'm proud of myself. i'm OVER IT! I'M OVER ITI'MOVERITI'MOVERIT!!!! THANK YOU GOD I'M OVER IT!

what DO i like about you?

I finished my scarf! I'm just so excited and I wanted to tell... no one in particular so i posted here haha. i'll put a picture up soon. It's kind of vintage-y. It's a grass green (not celadon, not kelly, not moss) deep double rib called the Cartridge stitch with black satin bows at the ends. I feel like it should be worn with a cute trench coat and a cloche. So if I ever sell my designs one day I will specify how they are to wear it ;0)

I'm also starting these SWEET sleeves (super large... arm warmers) made out of Kidsilk Haze and its like... knitting a whisper. Seriously it's messed up but it'll be so pretty. The OTHER bad thing is somehow my knitting needles are the EXACT same color as the yarn. I don't know how that happened it was the only pair they had and it just turns out that they're the same color. So... you're knitting invisible fluffy whispers. Sweet. It'll turn out ok... 'specially since I painted one needle silver so I could SEE.

Did I tell you I like knitting? I do. Totally do.

I used to carry the weight of the world...

"but now all I wanna do is spread my wings and fly..."

So the past few days have been interesting. Just... I don't know just interesting. My mom and I were talking about friends and how you expect so much out of them and when they don't meet them you feel like it's YOUR fault. My pastor says your closest relationships have to be with people you feel like you can share your most RANDOM thoughts with and at the same time share about God and help each other spiritually. How many people can really say they have that person in their life? And how many are still looking for it? Yeah that's totally my hand in the air.

I do have a friend like that. She is in graduate school and forever busy (she's gonna be a doctor) and I don't see her as often as I want to but when we do see each other it's like we just met up yesterday. The conversation flows easily. We talk about the most random things like why we didn't get hired at Argo Tea or our relationship with God and it's usually the highlight of my whole day.

I guess I'm looking for a friend like that that I can see more often. I mean don't get me wrong I have friends but... I'm placed into a certain type of friend. Comic reliever. Advice giver. Random... hanger outer. Consoler. Listener. I love being all those things and I love all my friends I adapt to their personalities and accept them but they don't adapt to mine.

So I knit. I knit a lot. Most people find that really antiquated and boring but I freakin LOVE it. I make cute stuff... without reindeer and snowflakes... I mean things that people want. but most people don't... really care. I just am tired of people being selfish (omg especially today don't get me started.) and self centered and while I realize that is truly the norm now I'm pretty done with it. Yeah I'm 22 just getting started with life but I've been through enough to at least know what I want out of a friendship. Is that too much to ask? Can ya stop with all the bull? It's not about you. GET OVER IT. for realz. with a z.

Anway, things are progressing well here at work but I am really starting to miss designing. I don't want to lose skills. I'm saving for a computer so I'm not just floating until I get a job in my field. I miss fonts GAH I miss fonts! I miss having direction and projects. But I'll get there soon. Every opportunity is a stepping stone for something greater, and I am really looking forward to that day.

warning sign

Since starting at Eden I've realized I enjoy working with people. You get all sorts of personality types, quirks, quips, other things that start with "qu-" It's fun dealing with the nice ones... not so much dealing with the snooty ones, but I pray over the clients that walk in beforehand and so far I have not been cursed out! (which I can't say about other g.c's) so that's great.

It's a little difficult dealing with the kooky personalities haha. There was a Jewish princess who really... enjoys... talking about... *breathes in* everything private. And an... otherwise pursuaded couple who... likes checkin out girls as they walk into the shop. I mean you kinda wanna go "oooooo....." haha that's not the way to approach things. They haven't spewed pea soup at you or anything. Their head only reaches a 90 degree angle at most. No need for comments. But I can hope that being in here helps though. Highlight that JUST happened though? Three words. Fire. Safety. Inspection. :0)

I met with a friend yesterday for lunch, hadn't seen her for a while. I can honestly say that graduating with totally change you. She is the type of person who has a concrete plan for life. After graduation is SUPER shifty changy nothing is really... set it's kinda like living in Jell-O for a good 6 months to a year. So instead of wading through the Jell-O like a pro she goes comPLETELY backwards. It's almost like her entire identity is changing because she doesn't have a set plan. It's crazy how a change thats out of your control will change who you are... who you CAN control. BAH life.