Monday, August 29, 2016

This is 30

Welcome to 30! You have arrived here by not dying and generally listening to your mother's advice. Here in this detailed guide you'll find how to make your 30's the BEST years of your life! Brunch! Mimosas! More brunch! Disregard for clothing rules! You'll take your shoes off wherever you dang well please, thank you very much!

Here, I present, A LIST, mostly provisioned from my Twitter account. I also said I wouldn't put these in a blog. HAHA OH 30. SUCH A JOKESTER.

  • My appetite has changed, which I've literally been waiting for it to do since I was 10. Like I can't eat as much food or I'll just keel over all slumped and sad
  • My body now genuinely REJECTS certain foods. Potatoes, for example, I can no longer have a ton of potatoes or starchy foods in general
  • Greasy food too...
  • Bread is still okay
  • AND TACOS. Still bae. Always bae.
  • Doctors are more a part of my life. After I came back from vacation I got super sick and saw the doc a LOT
  • I finally recognize my need for exercise. It clears my head and makes me feel both sore and positive about life - WHAT?!
  • Hangovers! They're so real!
  • Every few weeks now I cry about being alone... dying alone... getting ice cream alone
  • Then I look out across the land of hoes and dudes made of trash and I TIGHTEN THE EFF. UP
  • My introversion is solidified in stone. I can only do so much before the need to recharge completely overrides all functionality and I completely break down
  • Stress greatly impacts my need to recharge as well
  • I still hate pants
  • I have ice cream for dinner a lot
This new phase of my life is interesting and a bit of a rollercoaster. But there are more smooth sails than ups and downs. I hope you'll stay around for this journey with me. 30 needs people. 

No comments:

Post a Comment


Related Posts with Thumbnails