Wednesday, November 25, 2009

remoulade

i don't even understand how this story didn't end up here but here it is.

there was a mouse in my apartment like 3 weeks ago and honestly I can't tell you how. We live on the 3rd floor. THE THIRD floor! It must have ninja-army crawled its way up the gas pipe (and how did it not DIE from asphyxiation) and my niece spotted it. "Too big to be a bug." Those words struck fear in my bones. I remember having a mouse in the house on Dixie. I came in the kitchen and we stared at each other before running off to our respective holes.

So we told Autumn (the niece) to go back and check, with my mom in tow, cuz apparently she LIKES disease-ridden rodents and sure enough there was a mouse. What happened next can't really be described but I'm going to try. There were 4 people in the apartment - my mom, myself, my niece Autumn and my nephew Aaron - and there were 4 completely DIFFERENT emotional reactions to this tiny, scared, little, fat mouse.

Mom - ends up yelling, "THERE'S A MOUSE! THERE'S A MOUSE! THERE'S A MOUSE!" while turning in endless cirlces on a rug in our living room. Then she burst into tears and got angry and accepted it. My mother went through all 5 stages of grief in 5 minutes.
Autumn - as aforementioned, wanted to befriend the mouse and named him Alfalfa. My grandmother named him Alfeefee.
I - FREAKED OUT and stayed off the floor as if it were mouse infested hot lava.
Aaron - the processor, stayed quiet and then asked if anyone had a gun so he could potentially shoot the mouse.
*scenario* "This is your nightly 10 o'clock news. In the sleepy village of Flossmoor there was a quadruple homicide allegedly accidental but no one's alive to tell the story! The only witness? A grey mouse spotted under the stove in the kitchen." that's how it would have went down.

So there were 4 vortexes of emotions happening all the while this mouse is just CHILLIN' under our stove. My mom went into army warfare mode after the brief teary scene and tried to call a bunch of people. Meanwhile my niece is still fawning over it and my nephew is still pensive with the occasional, "........So is it gone yet?" I close EVERY DOOR in the apartment and my mom YELLED at me for it!
Mom: "I can't be claustrophobic in my own house OPEN THAT DOOR!"
Me: "MOM!... MOM! MOM!... MOM!...MOM!!MOM! MOM!" *hands flailing wildly*

Yes, in case of a mouse keep everything OUT IN THE OPEN. What?!?!?!

Finally we contacted a friend who took my mom mouse trap shopping and we caught it in a few days. I told my niece who was distraught. My mom said I shouldn't have told her buuuut I didn't care! DISEASES! That word alone justifies my case. I win.

Even though it's been however many weeks since we caught it I still flip the light on in the kitchen, peek my head around and THEN enter the kitchen - ya know just in case any more army warefare ready mice decide to invade again.

We still laugh over this story mostly over the 4 vortexes of emotion that happened. I wish I could show you how it was... it's way better when I tell it.
Did I tell you I stole something from Jewel once? Ah, another day. :0)

Monday, November 23, 2009

misunderstandings of flapjack

Some friends of mine decided my family needs to be on television. It's true... we do... we're absolutely out of the box in terms of families. I'll be posting stories of dumb stuff we do, dumb stuff I say and things like that. So that means I'll be posting a LOT more : ) HAHA

For example today:

It's cleaning day. We have an annual cleaning day before each high holiday of the year because family comes over. We revamped the living room to accommodate the tree and put up like... 4 picture frames. There's lots of Pledge and Fabuloso involved - it's just what we do.

Anyway my mom is just outside my room doing something that involves rugs and cleaning them. She comes into my room and looks at the scratches on the bottom of my door and goes, "Ooh, a dog lived here."
I'm at my computer and turn slowly around, "Mom! I know I have a lot of hair and that I shed but there is NO REASON to call me a dog. I'm gonna clean up! Promise."
My mom looks confused. "Abby! Look at the door. AN ACTUAL DOG used to live here. Why would I call you a dog haha"
"Oh... I thought you were trying to drop a hint that I needed to clean..."
my bad... I mean my mom usually will just SAY clean up not be like 'hey mangy mutt clean your JUNK up!'

or yesterday when my mom told my grandma not to bring food to Thanksgiving dinner because she is getting older and doesn't need to do the brunt of the work. She wants to help so we give her a few things. This year it was macaroni and cheese and sweet potato pies. This is the gist of the conversation she had with my mom.
Grandma: OK, so I'm making a ham for here (meaning her house) and some dressing. Do you need me to bring dressing?
Mom: *giant pause* No, mom that's... we're... we're good.
Grandma: Oh, ok I'm making greens for here and potato salad. Are you makin' potato salad? I could bring the potato salad. Oh I'm makin' sweet potato pies, too. OO! and I'm bringin' the cake right?
Mom: Mom, I'M making the cake... but I mean you can... uh...

NOT ONCE did my Grandma even mention the macaroni which we THOUGHT she was bringing!!! She does this every year. We'll give her a small task so she's not overwhelmed and she like bogarts the menu and brings EVERYTHING. I swear to bob next year she'll break out and be like, "This duck was ON SALE for $0.39 a pound! I just had to get it!" Plus we have this running joke about Peking duck. I don't... actually remember how that started, what it's about or why it's still funny but all three are still goin strong. That's just us.

Tomorrow I'll tell you the story of the mouse... cuz the world needs to know. I'll have to figure out how to write that down it works much better when I tell it. I guess that's the good thing about writing EXACTLY how you talk... eh? eh? right???

Friday, November 13, 2009

triple chapel! triple chapel! triple chapel!

try sayin' that... it's difficult right? I knows.

Last weekend was my Olivet adventure. It was extra interesting from start to finish. It started out with me going to the gas station to fill up my tire. In all my awesomeness I ended up DEFLATING my tire while trying to inflate it. Yep, you heard correct. I let more air out while trying to put air in. This is no small feat. It's a learned SKILL, passed down from ancient Incans who invented the car and used air pumps CENTURIES before Henry Ford. *ahem* Sounds plausible right? After freaking out and semi crying/hyperventilating I drove to my trusty mechanic who filled it right up after expressing concern at how dangerously low my tire was. I explained the situation and he told me to keep an eye on it. Did I mention I paid $1.50 in quarters at the gas station to DEFLATE my tire? Did I mention my trusty mechanic will fill your tires for FREE anytime? You live and learn.

After finally getting on the road and making it down to B-town I trekked over to the field, where I had to pay 10 bucks to get in!! I would have gotten in for free if the tire mishap didn't happen. I haven't had to pay for a football/basketball game in 9 years. NINE! Travesty. Blood thirsty money suckers! I'm better. The game... well our football team seriously sucks tennis balls. I did enjoy seeing band friends, including this one kid I don't even KNOW who called me a hero. I mean I am a lil bit... if you don't know you better ask somebody!

I watched halftime and commented on sexy flute angles and my signature move (seriously I'm a lil awesome!) I went and had lunch with Sarah, bf, Crystal and Katherine. It was good to see everyone and, of course, the Chinese food was fantastical. Shout out to Sweet Annie's who still holds the record for the best red velvet cupcakes in the WORLD. It's the frosting. I think it's whipped cream cheese frosting. It's lighter than air, which almost justifies eating way too many in one sitting.

During dinner I realized I triple booked myself. I committed myself to eating with Sarah and Kat, Josh and April, AND Maggie. I honestly don't know how I did it. I stayed the longest with Sarah and Kat cuz I told them first. Then I went to El Burrito with Maggie for a $1 churro and horchata (cinnamon-y loooove) for like half an hour then... well then I went back to the music building for a potty break (heh) then to Panda Express/Oberweis for NO food and Josh, April, Sammy, Faith and MATT. WHITE! Busiest day. ever. All of it was fun though!

It was nice to see everybody and that people actually wanted to SEE me. Exactly the opposite of living up here. All in all a good weekend of CRAZY awesomeness.

Next weekend is the gospel choir concert! yaaaay. Let's hope I don't have to fill up any tires before then.
p.s. happy 100th post! : )

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

writin' this down!

This keeps poppin up in my head and I want to get it out:

I want to own a knitting shop/bakery one day. I think it would be awesome. As soon as I typed this my heart went a little sour. I don't know if it's nerves or the wrong thing to want. I think my mom could work there and my niece and sister as well. It would just be a family run... cute little business. I like it. And my heart is still like, "NOOOO!" lol mixed emotions...

Also, goin' down to Olivet this weekend for homecoming and copious amounts of eating haha. I think I'm going for the gospel choir concert as well in two weeks. I can't resist good music/dancing all for Jesus whaaat?! haha

b the dubs i finished 1 hat. workin on the reincarnation of the other one now. same style. same button. same color. same AWESOMENESS.

preeeviiiiew!

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